Sisakti Huyi Zindagi ...!

by aloNe iN DaRk Tue Sep 09, 2008 6:54 am

Aaj school say chutti huyi to woh bacha jo kisi ki aankh ka taara hai jo kisi ko be-had pyara hai akaila hi apney ghar ko chal parra uss ki umar to itni na thi ke ussey gher ka rasta yaad rehta par uss ke qadmon ko uthney par majboor sirf aik hi khayal ne kiya tha..! Woh ye ke school takreeban khali ho chuka tha sab ke maan baap apney bachon ko ley kar chaley gaye aur woh tanha school ke baahir deewaar say taik lagaye baitha tha janey mosam kaisa tha, shayad garmi yaan shayad sardi par woh ye sab zyada dair bardasht na kar saka aur chal deya..! Chaltey chaltey uss ka bhaari school bag jo shayad uss ke wazan say bhi zyada wazni tha khul gaya aur kitabein zameen par aa gireen..! Duniya say anjaan halaat say be-khabar woh apni kitabein samaitney laga ke itney mein ussey koi jaani pehchani aawaz aayi aankh uttha ker daikha to uss bachey ke ghar ka aik fard qadam barrhata huwa ussi ki janib aa raha tha ussey daikh kar bachey ka chehra be-ikhtiyar khil gaya per woh shaks jaisey hi uss ke qareeb aaya to aik aawaz kaanon mein parri "Maira intezaar nahin kar sakta tha" aur aik thaparr uss bachey ki ankhon mein ansoo ley aaya..! Uss ke chehrey ki muskurahat chin gayi ikk nazar uss ne apni kitabon ki taraf daikha aur phir keh bhi na saka key "Gir gayin hain utha dein"..! Ghar aaya to maan ne sadka diya ke laal ghar aaya hai par woh aatey hi apni maan ke seeney say lag gaya aur siskiyan ley ley kar roney laga...! Kehna chahta tha par keh bhi na saka ke woh school mein akaila reh gaya tha iss liye ghar ki taraf chal parra !!!!

Yehi bacha hosh sambhalta gaya aur apney aap ko aik kooozey mein band karta gaya woh bhi aisey ke uss ke baad uss ka wahan say bahir aana ikk na mumkin sa fail tha shayad..! Apney gird ke halaat say larrta huwa har pal kisi kashmaksh mein aksar raaton ko akaila ghar say baahir nikal parrta iss itmenaan say ke shayad abb woh barra ho chuka hai ussey ghar ka rasta maloom hai aur woh ghar wapis chala jaye ga..! Apna man halka kerney ko ussey kisi aur jagah ka nahin bas ussi jagah ka khayal aata ussi jagah par pyar aata jo aik phoolon ki kayari aik baagh ki deewaar ke saath thi jo baagh uss ke ghar say kuch door tha..! Woh bas ghanton ussi baagh mein ussi kayari ke paas deewaar say taik lagaye rota bhi tha aur phoolon say baatein bhi karta tha..! Kabhi ghusey mein khud ko unn hi phoolon ke kaantey chaboney lagta to khabhi ghaas ko zameen say ukhaarr deta..! Par aisey mein uss ke aansoo na ruktey they wohi siskiyan wohi sab kuch janey kya chahti thi zindagi uss say !!!

Phir ikk waqt aata hai jab woh khud ko inn sab baaton say be-asar sa samajh kar apna seena chorra kar ke halaat ka majbooriyon ka mushkilon ka muqabla karney ki thaan leta hai par kuch hi arsey mein ussey iss baat ka ehsaas ho jaata hai ke nahin woh aisa kuch nahin kar sakta, ke nahin uss par wohi chaap lagi hai uss ke naseeb mein wohi siskiyan hain wohi sab kuch jiss say woh nafrat karta hai !!!

Woh bacha abb khasa barra ho gaya tha itna ke muqabla kar sakta tha, karna chahta bhi tha par haara...! Haar gaya woh pehli hi baar jawani mein qadam rakhtey hi shayad uss ki haar uss ke naseeb mein likh di gayi...! Toot gaya phir bikhar sa gaya kahin bhi daikhta to wahan umeed hotey huwey bhi ussey apni haar ka hi dar laga rehta himat juta na pata tha woh kuch kerney ki kuch kehney ki magar mehnat karta gaya jitni woh kar sakta tha jitni uss mein sakat thi..! Iss doraan apni pareshani apni iss la-hasili say chuttkara paney ke liye abb woh uss baagh mein nahin jaata tha abb ussey uss kayari say bhi shayad pyar nahin raha tha kyun ke kayari phool, phoolon ke kaantey woh ghaas inn sab ki jagah aur bohat si cheezon ne ley li thi jin ke hotey huwey woh khud ko sakoon mein samjhta tha Nadan tha..! Kaisi cheezon mein saharey dhoondta phirta tha !!!

Phir yoon huwa ke jawani aa hi gayi par ye ajab hi thi uss ki umar ke nojawaan larrkey hasna khailna idher udher ghoomna sab kuch kartey they aur uss ko fiker hoti thi ke abb college ke baad phir ussey kaam par jaana hai kaam karey ga aur behtar say behtar nokri ki talash karni hai taa ke woh mazeed aagey barrh sakey ye aik tarah say acha hi tha ke woh uss umar mein kaam kar raha tha jab nojawan sirf paisey kharchna jaantey hain..! Woh aik lehaz say mutmaen bhi tha ke haan woh kuch kar jaye ga khud ke liye unn ke liye jin ke liye woh karna chahta hai..! Qismet kahin na kahin ley jaye gi aur kyun na ley jaye gi nayi umangein nayi umeedein phir say jawan huyi theen bohat arsey baad uss ne apni issi zindage issi daerey mein dil lagana seekh liya tha !!!

Phir yoon huwa ke ussey mohabbat huyi be-panah mohabbat huyi par jaaney kya manzoor tha taqdeer ko qismet ko woh khud bhi janta tha ke mohabbat naam ka ye keerra issey khokhla kar dey ga aur woh aisa girey ga ke phir kabhi na utth paye ga par nahin wohi aik meettha zehar ban kar uss ki nason mein utar gaya aur phir yoon huwa ke uss ki mohabbat chali gayi aur woh daikhta hi reh gaya !!!

Phir sambhla khud ko hosla diya apney doston say mohabbat ki apney uss pehley pyar ko apni nadani samajh ker bhoolna chahta tha..! Dost jab zindagi mein aaye to unn ke liye sab kuch karney ko tayar baitha rehta aur aksar okaat kar bhi jaata..! Unn ke liye palon mein apney maqasid apni zindagi ko bhi bhool jaata..! Bohat azeez dost thay woh uss ke aur woh dost bhi ussey bohat tawajah detey bohat tarjeeh detey..! Waqt, halaat sab behtar hota gaya ussey aney ghar sey zyada apni tanhai to azeez thi hi par apni tanhai ke baad abb ussey ghar say zyada doston par aitemaad hona shuroo ho gaya unn hi per aitbaar karney lag parra woh..! Saharey to dhoondta hi rehta tha shuroo say par uss lamhey ussey laga ke abb zindagi katt jaye gi sakoon say, aram say apney inn hi doston ke saath sab saath rahein gey..! Kaisi kaisi baatein kiya karta tha ke main tumharey liye ye karoon ga woh karoon ga par bass baatein hi karta reh gaya..! Halaat ne moqa nahin diya aur kuch arsey ke baad woh apney hi ghar walon par bojh ban gaya..! Khawa woh bohat kam arsa tha par shayad bohat zor daar..! Tofaan say kam na tha woh sab choott gaye sab sangi saathi tanha reh gaya phir !!!

Aik din socha uss ne palat kar dekha toh kis qadar rawani thi uss ki zindagi mein iss Aaney Jaaney ke khail ki idher aaya udher gaya aur woh daikhta hi rehta tha..! Thaan li yahan uss ne thaan li ke abb kuch aisa na kerey ga kahin lagao nahin kahin ishtiaq nahib..! Tanha kar ley ga khud ko sab say sab say dooor kar ley ga apney aap ko phir wahin band kar dey ga ke jahan say nikalney ka socha karta tha kabhi..! Jawani say aik hi pal mein burrhapey mein paon rakh diya uss ne..! Par uss ki siskian tab bhi theen aur Aaj bhi !!!

Aaj woh bacha aik mard ban gaya hey larrakpan, jawani, iss sab ki kahaniyan bohat peechey chorr aaya hai par aaj bhi uss ki zindagi mein wohi khala wohi kami wohi adhoora pan wohi soona pan hai aaj uss ke paas sab kuch ho kar bhi kuch bhi nahin hai..! Aaj phir say uss ke bohat say dost hain aaj phir say woh apni tanhai ke baad apney doston mein hi ghira rehta hai..! Par aaj bhi jo khaala Bachpan mein hi uss ko mil gaye thay wahin ke wahin hain..! Har janib har taraf say kahin na kahin kisi na kisi cheez ki kami zaroor hai..! Woh sab kuch mukamal to na chahta tha..! Uss ne na hi sab kuch mukamal chaha..! Par phir bhi janey kyun thorrey ke liye bhi tarsa tarrpa aur sisakta raha..! Aur sisak raha hai..! Aaj bhi talashta hai saharey ko aaj bhi ussey zaroorat hai aakhir koi kab tak tanhai mein rahey koi kab tak uss ka muqabla karey..! Larr larr key muqabla kar kar ke thak chuka hai ussey sakoon chahiye abb kuch to, thorra to..! Par woh abb kisi par apna ye saya bhi nahin parrney dena chahta woh nahin chahta ke koi uss ke khol mein aaye to uss jaisa ho jaye woh khud ko shayad iss liye bhi tanha kiye huwey hai shayad jo uss ne thaana tha wohi kar raha hai..! Kahin rukwa diya jaata hai to kahin woh khud rok leta hai bass issi kashmakash mein hai aur rahey ga bhi woh abb nahin chahey ga ke koi uss ke paas aa ker uss ka saya khud par daal ley woh nahi chahta key abb koi uss ki sochon jaisi soch sochey shayad iss liye..! Phir bhi ye sab kar ke bhi ussey jaaney kyun sakoon ki talash hai woh kuch pal sakoon mein rehna chahta hai ..! Per sab sawalon ke jawab mein aik hi baat aati hai janey kab ? Aaj bhi woh baitha yehi soch raha hai ke bachpan say ley kar abb tak kya tha woh sab, kya hai ye sab ??

Ikk Sisakti Huyi Zindagi !!!